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I am Tosca

Hi there

Tosca is a feminine empowerment and embodiment coach, as well as a 500-hour yoga alliance certified yoga teacher with years of teaching experience, who helped many women over the last years in gaining more self-love, joy, and pleasure in their lives. 

The Mother Gap refers to the emotional, psychological, or energetic void left when the nurturing we needed from our mothers wasn’t fully provided. The mother gap is not necessarily about blaming the mother but recognizing the mismatch between expectations and reality. It can stem from various factors, including:

  1. Emotional Unavailability: A mother who is physically present but emotionally distant may struggle to meet her child’s need for connection and validation.
  2. Inconsistent Care: A mother who alternates between nurturing and neglecting behavior can leave the child uncertain about the stability of love.
  3. Overbearing or Controlling Behavior: A mother who exerts excessive control may suppress the child’s sense of individuality and autonomy.
  4. Cultural or Generational Factors: Societal pressures or inherited trauma can shape how a mother interacts with her child, sometimes leading to unintentional harm.

The mother gap often leaves children feeling unsupported, unseen, or misunderstood, even in cases where the mother had good intentions.


How the Mother Gap Affects Us

The emotional void created by the mother gap can have lasting consequences on how individuals perceive themselves, relate to others, and navigate life.

1. Low Self-Worth

Children who experience the mother gap often internalize feelings of inadequacy, believing they were not “good enough” to receive love or care. This can manifest as:

  • Chronic self-doubt.
  • A tendency to seek external validation.
  • Difficulty recognizing their own achievements.

2. Struggles with Emotional Regulation

Without a model for healthy emotional expression, individuals may:

  • Suppress their feelings, fearing rejection or judgment.
  • Experience intense emotional reactions in situations of perceived abandonment.
  • Struggle to identify or process their own emotions.

3. Relationship Challenges

The mother gap influences how individuals form connections with others, often leading to:

  • Difficulty trusting or relying on others.
  • A pattern of unhealthy relationships, such as people-pleasing or codependency.
  • Fear of intimacy or vulnerability.

4. Perfectionism and Overachievement

Some individuals respond to the mother gap by striving for perfection, hoping to “earn” the love and approval they lacked in childhood. This can lead to:

  • Burnout and overwork.
  • Fear of failure or rejection.
  • A sense of emptiness despite external success.

5. Generational Transmission

Unresolved feelings related to the mother gap can perpetuate cycles of unmet needs, as individuals may unconsciously repeat the patterns they experienced in their own parenting or relationships.

Read here more about how the Mother Wound affects us: Here

Acknowledging the Mother Gap

Healing begins with recognizing and naming the mother gap. It’s important to:

1. Validate Your Experience

  • Acknowledge that the pain of unmet needs is real and valid, even if your mother had good intentions or faced her own struggles.
  • Recognize that it’s possible to love and appreciate your mother while also mourning what was missing.

2. Reflect on the Impact

  • Identify specific moments or patterns that contributed to the mother gap.
  • Consider how these experiences have shaped your beliefs, behaviors, and relationships.

3. Separate Responsibility

  • Understand that your unmet needs were not your fault.
  • Recognize that while your mother may have contributed to the gap, healing is your responsibility as an adult.

Healing the Mother Gap

While the void created by the mother gap can feel overwhelming, it’s possible to heal and create a life filled with love, connection, and fulfillment.

1. Reparent Yourself

Offer yourself the care, validation, and nurturing you didn’t receive.

Practice affirmations like, “I am worthy of love and care just as I am.”

Develop routines that prioritize self-compassion, such as journaling, therapy, or mindfulness practices.

2. Build Supportive Relationships

Seek relationships that offer unconditional love and understanding.

Surround yourself with friends, mentors, or chosen family who respect and value you.

3. Set Boundaries

If your mother continues to contribute to the gap, establish boundaries to protect your emotional well-being.

Learn to say no to dynamics that perpetuate guilt, shame, or over-responsibility.

4. Grieve What Was Missing

Allow yourself to mourn the love, support, or connection you didn’t receive.

Create rituals, such as writing a letter or lighting a candle, to honor your feelings and release the pain.

5. Rewrite Your Story

Recognize that you are not defined by the mother gap or the wounds it created.

Reframe your narrative, focusing on your resilience, growth, and ability to create the life you deserve.

Read more in-depth about how to heal the Mother Wound here.


Transforming the Mother Gap

While the mother gap may leave a lasting imprint, it doesn’t have to define your future. By acknowledging its effects and taking intentional steps toward healing, you can bridge the gap with self-love, self-compassion, and meaningful connections.

Transforming the mother gap is a journey of reclamation—reclaiming your worth, your voice, and your power. In doing so, you not only heal yourself but also create a legacy of love and wholeness that can ripple through your relationships, community, and future generations.


Family dynamics often shape two types of children: those who unconsciously repeat the cycles of pain, dysfunction, and unresolved trauma, and those who courageously choose to break free and heal.

Repeating the cycle often stems from a lack of awareness or the belief that things cannot change, while breaking the cycle requires bravery, introspection, and intentional effort. You have the power to decide which path you’ll take.

Do you want to address your mother wound, transform your pain into empowerment, and step into your most authentic self? Join my course or sign up for Goddess Medicine today and start your journey toward healing and freedom. Your future self is waiting.

Keep reading about the Mother Wound:

Healing the Mother Wound

How The Mother Wounds Affect Us

Finding Forgiveness for the Mother Wound

What is The Mother Gap

Power Dynamics of the Mother Wound

Discovering the Inner Mother

Breaking Generational Trauma: The Costs And Benefits

The Taboo of Questioning Motherhood

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I’ve spent years passionately guiding women in feminine embodiment, leadership, and self-love, helping them reconnect with their innate power, wisdom, and authentic expression., helping hundreds reconnect with their innate feminine power, wisdom, and authentic expression. My journey as a mentor has been one of profound personal growth and dedication. I know firsthand that reclaiming feminine power requires courage, self-awareness, and deep inner work, and I have embraced this path with authenticity and integrity. This commitment has equipped me to hold safe, nurturing spaces where women feel empowered to explore, heal, and thrive.

Developing Unique Tools and Practices:As a feminine embodiment and leadership mentor, a 500-hour Yoga Alliance certified yoga teacher, and an experienced retreat organizer, I have spent years exploring, practicing, and developing my own set of tools and practices. Through time spent living and traveling in India, Thailand, Indonesia, and other countries, I’ve gained a rich diversity of insights that guide women to connect deeply with their bodies, emotions, and inner wisdom. My methods integrate yoga, breathwork, meditation, sensual work, and feminine embodiment practices, creating a holistic approach that fosters healing and transformation. By blending ancient wisdom with modern insights, I help my clients release old patterns, rediscover their sensuality, and build confidence in their self-expression.

 Giving Transformative Experiences: I share my wisdom both online and through immersive, in-person retreats, where I have led 6-9 retreats annually over the past few years. These retreats are more than just gatherings; they are transformative experiences that allow women to step away from the chaos of daily life and reconnect with their true selves. Each retreat is carefully curated to provide a balance of self-reflection, healing, and community, fostering a sense of belonging and sisterhood. A Unique Approach That Resonates: What sets my approach apart is my unwavering commitment to ensuring each woman feels genuinely seen, heard, and understood. Through a foundation of deep empathy and attentiveness, I foster an environment where clients feel safe to explore and express themselves fully, free from judgment. By providing personalized guidance, I support women in awakening self-love, nurturing self-care, and discovering a renewed sense of purpose. Many clients describe our work together as “life-changing,” not only because of the emotional healing they experience but also due to the profound shifts in self-connection and personal empowerment—guided by the deeply caring, nurturing essence of the divine feminine that I bring into each session.

 Empowering Women Worldwide: Whether through my online programs, workshops, or retreats, my mission is clear: to empower women to embrace their femininity, trust their inner voice, and live authentically. I have helped women from all walks of life find the courage to reclaim their power, embrace their sensuality, and express their deepest truths. For me, this work is not just a profession; it is a calling, a way to uplift and inspire a global community of women to step into their fullest, most radiant selves.


I'm Tosca, your new feminine embodiment, tantra & Feminine Leadership Coach, Mentor & BFF

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The Art of Letting Go (With the Power of Tantra For Women)
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"Seriously the best decision to go on Tosca´s Retreat. Just do it."

I can’t begin to describe what a transformative week I had with Tosca at the private retreats. I ended up receiving so much more than I ever expected.

In Tosca’s capable hands, I was given a unique opportunity to challenge some of the long-held ideas and beliefs about myself that I didn’t even know I was carrying. I was provided a safe space to grieve and heal from wounds I thought were long buried. I was offered, patiently and consistently, an open and accepting heart as she gently guided me through a very difficult transition in my life.
I am grateful for her willingness to listen and hold space for me with so much love and compassion. Tosca truly has an exquisite gift and I highly recommend one of her retreats. If it doesn’t transform the way you approach your spirituality entirely, it will, at the very least, shift your perceptions of your deepest self and the way you view the world. You will leave with the feeling that your very soul was both heard and loved.

Paige, 1:1 private retreat

01

"Tosca creates the most welcoming non-judgmental environment. I walked away knowing that I am enough and that I will always have unconditional love within myself."

Branda, Self-love 1:1 Private Retreat

02

Branda, Self-love 1:1 Private Retreat

03

We covered so many aspects including limiting beliefs, emotional alchemy, shadow work. This was truly eye opening. I walked away knowing that I am enough and that I will always have unconditional love within myself. I don’t need to try and find it and approval in another person. I can be me and that is wonderful!

I really enjoyed waking my inner goddess. I have stuffed my inner goddess down for years. I have not truly let her out. With Tosca’s help through meditation and exercises. I was able to see her for the first time in a long time. I need to remember she is always there and let her out! I recognize she is truly beautiful, fun and adventurous.

I was carrying so much hurt and pain. This was causing my energy to be blocked. Tosca showed me through meditation and letting go exercises, I was able to release some of this hurt.
I enjoyed the Cacao ceremony. It really brought together all the sessions into a final ceremony that left a lifelong impression on me. I felt amazing at the end of the retreat. It couldn’t have been more perfect. Tosca also set up a Sound Healing for me which felt good. It really helped keep my energies flowing and focus on the me that is going to love herself going forward.

I would highly recommend this retreat for any woman that needs to remember who she is and that she is loved! Tosca creates the most welcoming non-judgmental environment. The accommodations were beautiful, warm and inviting. The food was amazing, beautiful and very healthy. a space where everyone can share, and everyone can heal.

"Tosca makes you feel so loved, seen, understood and felt"

We felt very encouraged by Tosca and each other. Tosca really supported us during the whole process. She shows a lot of compassion, especially for the ones needing more support. She was able to give each and every one of us what we needed from this program.

I went through a lot of feelings during this time, I connected to my soft energy, as well as to my powerful energy. This program is a space to really be open, to share, and to show, what is inside. Tosca really supports us to be open and to look inside, because sometimes it is scary to go through that process, to be ourselves, or to express ourselves and I think it's not an easy job to create a space where everyone can share, and everyone can heal.


Lin, Women of the wild retreat

04

"This retreat was everything that I needed and wished for and so much more."

Tosca, I want to thank you for this wonderful retreat and your coaching. It was all about the feminine energy, and you took care of each one of us. I was able to discover my soft energy, as well as my own power. we experienced true togetherness and you took care of us at all times. I really, really enjoyed being here and I opened my heart, I could really show some intimate things about myself feeling completely safe and supported. For this, I want to thank you, from all of my heart.

Miriam, group retreat

05

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